What I Would Change as a Loving Mother: The Choice to Model Sobriety in My Feminine Leadership
- Mapule Shilubane
- Jun 14
- 4 min read
A heartfelt reflection from a feminine leader and mother on the impact of drinking alcohol in front of children, and how choosing sobriety has deepened her embodiment, clarity, and maternal integrity.
A Mother's Reflection: The Sacred Mirror of Motherhood
There are moments in motherhood that call us into deep honesty. Moments when we’re invited to meet ourselves with grace not through shame, but through reverence for who we are becoming.
If I could go back and change one thing as a loving mother and feminine leader, it would be this:
I would not have modeled drinking alcohol in front of my children.
This choice often normalized, socially accepted, and even glamorized once felt harmless. A glass of wine at dinner. Champagne to celebrate. Sips shared in moments of laughter. But over time,
I came to realize that the way I related to alcohol was not just about me. It was shaping the emotional safety, values, and nervous system imprint of my children.
The Energetic Cost of Casual Drinking
As women, we are energetic transmitters. Everything we embody our tone, habits, presence, and rituals becomes a template for those who watch us closely, especially our children.
When I drank, even casually, I felt the subtle split in my field.
My emotional availability became clouded.
My rituals of rest were replaced with a false softness, an external escape rather than an internal exhale.
My intuitive clarity so sacred to my feminine leadership dimmed, even if momentarily.
What I once saw as indulgence or harmless celebration slowly revealed itself as disconnection.
I wasn’t fully there. Not in the deepest, clearest way my soul longed to be. And while I didn’t consider myself a heavy drinker, I realized that even light drinking carried a frequency that no longer matched my commitment to embodied motherhood and divine feminine stewardship.
Why This Matters for Our Children
Our children do not need perfect mothers.
But they need present ones.
They need women who show them what it means to soothe without substances.
To celebrate with spirit, not spirits. To choose coherence over coping.
The feminine is sacredly cyclical, emotional, and intuitive. Alcohol distorts those rhythms. It numbs the body we are meant to feel. And in trying to "unwind," we unconsciously teach our daughters and sons that we need to alter ourselves to relax, to connect, to cope with life.
I didn’t want that legacy.
Embodiment After Alcohol: The Return to Wholeness
The decision to no longer drink in front of my children or at all wasn’t just about them. It was a reclamation of my full feminine embodiment.
I began to:
Feel my emotions more deeply, and express them in nourishing, healthy ways.
Anchor into new rituals of relaxation herbal infusions, sensual bathing, embodied dance.
Model celebration and self-care that didn’t come in a glass, but in the glow of presence.
Sobriety, for me, is not about restriction.
It’s about sovereignty.
It’s about modeling a life where softness doesn’t require sedation. Where joy isn’t poured,
but remembered.
The Feminine Legacy I Choose Now
As a mother, I am the first mirror. My children look into me and learn who they are, how the world holds them, and how to hold themselves.
By choosing to no longer drink in their presence or at all I am choosing a new kind of leadership:
One rooted in clarity.
One embodied in softness that is real, not artificially induced.
One that leaves a legacy of emotional depth, not denial.
To any mother who feels this truth rise in her body know that it’s never too late to begin again. Your children do not need a perfect you.
They need your whole, present, awake, radiant truth.
And that truth begins in your body.
Ready to Embody a Softer, Sober, and More Sacred You?
If this reflection stirred something in your heart if you’re longing to parent, lead, and live with more presence, softness, and sovereignty you're not alone.
I invite you to begin your own return to wholeness.
Join my free Feminine Glow Letter • a weekly love note for mothers, women, and leaders awakening to embodied feminine power.
Explore “Soft Life Reset Temple ™️” • my signature journey into emotional restoration, intuitive rituals, and sacred living without substances.
Book a private Feminine Wellness Session • for gentle, guided support as you rewrite your legacy with clarity, grace, and intention.
You are not here to numb your light. You are here to feel it all, hold it all, and pass down truth.
Let’s walk this soft and sovereign path together.
I am Mapule Mammita a Feminine Wellness Guide, Intuitive Skincare Therapist, and
Womb-Centered Mentor devoted to helping women soften back into their bodies, reclaim their inner glow, and live in alignment with their feminine essence.
Through my offerings: like the She Who Softens™ journey, the Feminine Glow Cycle, and sacred skincare rituals with Pink Milk Natural Luxury I guide women into a slower, softer, and more sovereign way of being.
My work gently opens the door to:
Remembrance • reconnecting you to your body, your emotions, and the sacred wisdom of your feminine rhythm.
Regulation • through intuitive skincare, womb-centered rituals, and nervous system nourishment.
Radiance • cultivated from within, through presence, softness, and soul-aligned self-devotion.
Whether you’re a mother, a creative, or a woman simply longing to feel more at home in herself my work is here to remind you:
Your softness is sacred. Your body is the portal. Your glow is your gift.
If you’re ready to return to your feminine rhythm and rewrite your legacy with grace, I welcome you into this gentle, grounded, and glow-filled path.
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